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Welcome to Bad Baldmouth!


Census Data

General Information

  • Pop. Estimate: 28,246
  • Children: 20.50% (5,790)
  • Elderly: 18.50% (5,225)

Racial Breakdown

  • 12,570 minotaur (44.5%)
  • 9,378 lizardfolk (33.2%)
  • 5,876 gnome (20.8%)
  • 422 other (1.4%)

Misc.

  • 9 Districts
  • 523 Businesses
  • 4,356 Specialists
  • 3,618 Residences

Summary [-]

Bad Baldmouth is a metropolis in the Eastern Caladinat Province with a mixed population.

Environment [-]

Geography [-]

This desolate metropolis is densely populated (29,722/sq km), covers 0.95 square kilometers, and roughly has a diameter of 1099 meters.

Climate [-]

Bad Baldmouth has a Temperate Deciduous Forest climate, which is characterized by warm and wet summers with mild and dry winters, and has spring, summer, fall and winter seasons. Winds in the region are strong and the temperature is generally pleasant with minor variation. Precipitation is minor, and the sky is mostly cloudy.

Astronomy [-]

Bad Baldmouth sees a single star overhead: Kroc, an average orange star. Bad Baldmouth also has a double moon: Prole, an average dull brown moon and Charo, an average light blue moon. In the night sky, you see nothing unusual.

Cityscape [-]

Walls [-]

Visitors are greeted with a flimsy marble enclosure that is 17 meters tall. The city wall protects the core 100% of the city, with 5 towers spread along the 3.77 kilometer wall.

Streets [-]

There are 5 roads leading to Bad Baldmouth; 1 road is major. The city is lined with well-maintained cobblestone paths in a fragmented parallel pattern.

Districts [-]

The city is broken into the following districts: embassy, market, mercy, wealthy, trade, slums, civic, poor, and middleclass.

Government [-]

Bad Baldmouth is governed through an absolute monarchy, where the monarch rules unhindered. The government as a whole is seen as satisfactory. Officials in Bad Baldmouth are often seen as disreputable and the policies are ridiculed. The political influence of Bad Baldmouth in the region is receding due to a thwarted assassination attempt. In times of crisis, the population gives up their freedom in exchange for security.

Leader [-]

Bad Baldmouth is ruled by Emperor Zol. The Emperor has been in power for many years and is respected by the people. There is no visible opposition to the Emperor and policies. The right to rule was granted by force, and that power is maintained through a fair and just legal system.

Laws [-]

Laws are enforced by a racketeers, but are rarely enforced. Justice is served by mob rule, with a common punishment being hard labor.

Crime [-]

Crime is unusual. The most common crime is murder. The imprisonment rate is 0.56% of the population (158 adults).

Military [-]

Bad Baldmouth has a laid back attitude towards the military. Their standing army of 3813 citizens (13.5%) is at the ready, with a reserve force of 1694 (6%). Of the active duty military, 181 (4.75%) are special forces. Due to their laid back attitude and flimsy enclosure, Bad Baldmouth is terribly fortified. Bad Baldmouth fighters are much loved for their use of falchionn in battle. They are praised for their hoarde tactics and are considered perfectly skilled in battle.

Economy [-]

The economy in Bad Baldmouth is currently growing.

Resources [-]

Bad Baldmouth is known for the following resources:

  • Tame elephant parades that are avoided by gru.
  • Substantial creepy cocoa bean plantations that are feared by zombies. The locals speak of a chest containing diamonds in a well.
  • Poisonous quail bevies that are avoided by townspeople. Ghezin se Khalssen said the locals speak of bags of copper hidden around somewhere.
  • Magical hemp fields that are feared by magic users.
  • Magic guano banks that are hunted by kittens. The locals speak of piles of kitten mittens in a dungeon.
  • Vast fresh timber plantations that are frequented by witches.
  • Many creepy cocoa bean plantations that are frequented by locals. Mor Ghosttbeast said the locals speak of a chest containing emeralds buried near there.

Culture [-]

Legends [-]

Around town you'll hear the following legends:
  • A long time ago, a minotaur named Xrot frequented the swamps. Some say that if you face her, you will be driven mad.
  • Some time ago, a Pooka hunted the town. Folks say that the Pooka will sneeze three times, then turn you into a mouse.
  • Some time ago, a monster named Momd haunted the fields when the wind blows from the east. People say that if you face him, you will be stricken deaf.
  • Legends tell of Garond's Sceptre, a possessed sceptre with the ability to disappear on its own. It hasn't reappeared in years.

Events [-]

Bad Baldmouth is a lively city with many opportunities available.

Job Postings [-]

You'll find the following job postings:
  • Looking for work? Seasonal farm hands requested to help local farms bring in their harvest. Reward available. Experienced professionals only. Contact Wat if interested.
  • A passing Adept is needed for a small security job on the 3rd of the month. Reward available. Contact Faeellthil Dirthgazer for further details.
  • I'm looking for rare carniverous butterflies, both live and dead. I have a list of the ones I need. Will owe you a huge favor. Length of job expected to be short. Contact Don Braston.
  • Missing cerimonial knife. We suspect brain moles are the culprit. Will reward you with valuable information. Contact Mezn Metalgloom.
  • Looking for work? Adventurers willing to explore recently discovered ruins and return any valuable artifacts. Will pay in gold. Contact Anka for more details.
  • Need a change of pace? Seeking inter-planar messenger. Will reward you with valuable information. Special attire required. Contact Trellre if intrigued.
  • Seeking inter-planar messenger. Will owe you a huge favor. Contact Borgin Coralbreeches.
  • Scholar seeks rare supplies: Scholar unable to gather owlbear beak due to age, seeks trustworthy agents to gather materials for research. No previous experience required. Mild danger may be involved. Reward available. Contact Abanalthil Duskwake for more information.
  • Seasonal farm hands requested to help local farms bring in their harvest. Length of job expected to be short. Will reward you with valuable information. Contact Alavarlas Baequimoon.
  • gator wrasslin' contest this weekend. Special prize for first place finish. Reward available. Contact Zan Headsnapper.
  • Xuegd Greatfury has been kidnapped! Generous payment for safe return. Will reward you with valuable information. No pay until task is completed successfully. Contact Ilynalssa Baequimight if interested.
  • Need a change of pace? A passing Expert is needed for a small security job on the 3rd of the month. Reward is a secret. Length of job expected to be short. Contact Gaetanae Earthsong.
  • Pok Boartooth has been kidnapped! Generous payment for safe return. Length of job expected to be short. Will owe you a huge favor. Contact Barkon Smartcask.
  • I have quazits in my basement, plz halp! Will reward you with a land deed. Must be a quick learner. Contact Ibb Headcrusher.
  • Laborer required to bring stones to the castle. Wagon provided. Prior experience required. Will owe you a huge favor. Contact Kubbum Legripper.
  • Needed: I'm looking for rare rust rats, both live and dead. I have a list of the ones I need. A little danger is involved, so expect hazardous duty pay. No previous experience required. Reward is a secret. Contact Yerssen se S'herzin to learn more.
  • I'm looking for a Negotiator. Prior experience with troublesome grigs required. Reward available. Contact Yordal Honorroad.
  • Bored? Lockpick needed for totally legitimate reasons. Safety not guaranteed. Will reward you with valuable information. Contact Droril Bearblood.
  • Mercenaries wanted for caravan protection. Reward is a secret. Contact Durbul Bearkeg.
  • Scholar seeks rare supplies: Scholar unable to gather rare lichen due to age, seeks trustworthy agents to gather materials for research. Opportunity to earn a title. Contact Xuods Dreaddoom to learn more.
  • A passing Rogue is needed for a small security job on the 3rd of the month. Will reward you with valuable information. Serious inquiries only. Contact Rhobbagh Backbreaker for more details.

People [-]

The people in Bad Baldmouth despise outsiders.

Citizens [-]

The following citizens are worth mentioning:
  • Boneno Tinkerfiz is a male gnome who is known in the city as being a decent prostitute. He appears embittered.
  • Ada Coggleblast is a male gnome who is known in the world as being a legendary undertaker. He appears drunken.
  • Khalzin ahn S'herzor is a female lizardfolk who is known in the region as being a skilled specialty smith. She appears egotistical.
  • Khalal fe Ghezin is a female lizardfolk who is known in the neighborhood as being a decent painter. She appears fatalistic.
  • Tulby Cobblebun is a male gnome who is known in the neighborhood as being a decent jeweler. He appears gosipy.
  • Xainban Swiftsplitter is a female minotaur who is known in the city as being a gifted bounty hunter. She appears gosipy.
  • Bon Thermobit is a male gnome who is known in that part of town as being a poorly skilled good samaritan. He appears jesterly.
  • Torkey Cogglebit is a female gnome who is known in the world as being a laughably skilled bookseller. She appears treasure-obsessed.
  • Baistar Ormarr is a male minotaur who is known in the neighborhood as being a renowned locksmith. He appears greedy.
  • Calin Iceilg is a male minotaur who is known in the city as being a poorly skilled artist. He appears jaded.
  • Goeinand Athcaller is a male minotaur who is known in that part of town as being a decent armorer. He appears outlandish.
  • Bab Thermofiz is a male gnome who is known in the world as being a gifted librarian. He appears mopey.
  • Cotdan Tinkerwink is a female gnome who is known in the world as being a poorly skilled fishmonger. She appears unreliable.
  • Yerzor fe Khalzor is a male lizardfolk who is known in the city as being a gifted baker. He appears resentful.
  • Cotan Tinkercog is a male gnome who is known in the region as being a renowned pastrycook. He appears lovelorn.
  • Kialita Gyrogauge is a male gnome who is known in the world as being a decent jailer. He appears territorial.
  • Alin Earthsinger is a female minotaur who is known in that part of town as being a gifted barber. She appears homesick.
  • Tersey Bregmane is a male minotaur who is known in the neighborhood as being a skilled illuminator. He appears gambling.
  • Ghezin se Gheal is a female lizardfolk who is known in the city as being a laughably skilled haymerchant. She appears lovelorn.
  • Wizdan Greaseblast is a male gnome who is known in the city as being a laughably skilled butcher. He appears egotistical.
  • Bon Rockettonk is a male gnome who is known in the world as being a renowned chickenbutcher. He appears attentive.
  • Cot Greasegadget is a male gnome who is known in the city as being a horribly skilled handyman. He appears patronizing.
  • Ghezor heh Khalzor is a female lizardfolk who is known in the city as being a poorly skilled bookbinder. She appears efficient.
  • Gorder Domis is a female minotaur who is known in the world as being a decent sculptor. She appears xenophobic.
  • Gilvin Triggerbolt is a female gnome who is known in the city as being a skilled illuminator. She appears cowed.
  • Ghessen heh Ghezor is a female lizardfolk who is known in the region as being a renowned deputy. She appears mopey.

Travelers [-]

The following travelers are worth mentioning:
  • Yeral ahn Khalzor, a cautious female lizardfolk. She is a commoner who is on a mission from the gods.
  • Khalal teh Gheal, an easily offended female lizardfolk. She is an aristocrat who is on a mission for diplomacy.
  • Yerzin ahn Ghessen, a forgetful male lizardfolk. He is a warrior who is finding work as a skilled laborer.
  • Car Gyrobun, a xenophobic female gnome. She is a fighter who is seeing the city.
  • Tauroren Youngstrider, a loud male minotaur. He is an expert who is delivering a message to a ruler.
  • ToshLoa Sumbreaker, an intimidating male minotaur. He is an adept who is brokering a truce over a trade war.
  • Khalzin teh Ghezor, an attentive male lizardfolk. He is a rogue who is here to destroy a rumor.
  • Khalssen seh Ghezor, a trusting male lizardfolk. He is a commoner who is here to buy slaves.
  • Mogon Whitemist, a gambling male minotaur. He is a bard who is finding work as a spy.
  • Loodra Thunderwind, a beligerent male minotaur. He is a rogue who is traveling the world as a trader.
  • S'hoorzor teh Khalal, a worrying female lizardfolk. She is a cleric who is seeking revenge.

Locales [-]

Establishments [-]

These establishments worthy of mention in Bad Baldmouth:

  • The Prancing Hammer Our Motto Is the Buckle Stops Here [+]
  • The Ugly Pot Designs [+]
  • The New Elf Inc. [+]
  • The Boiling Goblins Sport House [+]
  • The Randy Peddler Public Jail [+]
  • The Thirsty Beauty Shrine [+]
  • The Yellow Tree Depot [+]
  • The Mulled Monkey Brewery [+]
  • The Leaping Boar Shop [+]
  • The Dwarven Lotus Shop [+]
  • The Tipsy Boar Supplies [+]
  • The Flaming Jane Inc. [+]
  • The Dancing Rooster Inc. [+]
  • The Master Bag Barrels [+]
  • The Divine Wagon Clinic [+]
  • The Lecherous Giant Glass Crafters [+]
  • The Wiley Flask Shop [+]
  • The Dry Cesspit Shoppe [+]
  • The Mended Cup Barrels [+]
  • The Lecherous Cat Glass Crafters [+]
  • The White Crate Inpirationsl Waters [+]
  • The Voluptuous Nomad Kennels [+]
  • The Shallow Thug Lumber Mill [+]
  • The Beefy Dead Shoppe [+]
  • The Dreaming Monkey Healers [+]
  • The Drinking Hen Arena [+]